So this morning I talked to an old friend and I guess my boyfriend is going through a lot more than he lets on. He really just wanted to keep me out of a lot of stuff to protect me and my feelings (or that is what I am choosing to believe) and he just needs to learn that he can’t do that. He is not superman. People need other people to help them and to talk to about things. I mean seriously, if you can’t tell your girlfriend things then who can you talk to??

 She also told me that he has depression issues and generally pushes the people who love him most away when he is going through rough times. He has never done this to me before so I guess this means he really cares?? Or maybe I am just in denial and can’t let go of him and really need to. I don’t know what to think right now. If I don’t hear from him within a few days then I suppose I will have no choice but to move on. Just not yet.

 It’s not as if I have no other options. I have been asked out more times since I’ve been with him than any other time in my life. I just want him. 

So that whole long distance relationship was going pretty well for a while. Now all of a sudden he doesn’t call me anymore and when I call him (if he answers) he’ll talk to me for about ten minutes and then say that he has to go and will call me back later, which he never does. He is pissing me off! Then this morning he is all cranky and makes it sound like we are over but then he just sounds emo so I’m not sure what I’m supposed to think. This other guy asked me out and I was going to say “yes” but then my “boyfriend” made it seem like we are still together… so confusing!! If anyone has any advice on what to do please let me know. If he hasn’t already broken up with me I think I may end it… this would be so much easier if I hated him. -.- 

Wow it’s been a long time since I’ve written anything. Well here’s an update on the long distance relationship thing:

Me and him have been going out for about a month now. It’s going good though the other day I received my phone bill and almost had a heart attack. That is to be expected though so I can’t complain. He has been away in another country for the last two weeks and I have only been able to talk to him once or twice. **tear**

Oh, and my friend that I talked about in January is doing well. She has a boyfriend who could be better, but at least she isn’t sneaking off to be with someone that no one knows and doing God knows what.

Hmm … don’t really know what else to say. Anyone seen any good movies lately? 

The other day I e-mailed a friend that I haven’t talked to in a really long time. I wasn’t really expecting an e-mail back but he did! I was so happy! I had liked this guy for about 5 years but never told him since he is older and I figured he wasn’t interested. Turns out I was wrong again. He told me that he’s liked me since forever and still does and he asked me to be his girlfriend. I would love to be his girlfriend but the problem is that he is in the army and lives across the US right now. I know that we could make the long distance thing work but I’m not certain. I’ve never done anything like this before. For now I told him that we should just be friends for a few weeks and see how that goes and then maybe we can try moving forward. If you have any advice on this please let me know.